Today’s post is about Our Autistic Valentine’s Day, a cute story is Lily and her “boyfriend” at school. It’s the last day of school before the half term holidays, and Jack mentioned his Nintendo Switch this morning, but he went quite happily without it. Which after the problems we’ve had this week that I highlighted in my last post. It was a major success, so it has been a good end to the week. Lily is off school again, but she just wanted to play computer games today. So I took the time to have a sort out around the computer desk.
Our dining room is supposed to also be the office, with Natalie working from home as well. It needs to be a functional working space, whilst also being usable for meal times. Currently it’s fit for neither, and resembles a bomb site more than anything else. But at least I’ve made a start on it.
Autistic Valentine’s Day
Today of course is Valentine’s Day. Lily despite only being 8 has a boyfriend. As much as I say aren’t you just friends, they won’t have it. He came round to see Lily before school, with his mum and dad, to give her a card and chocolate rose. Lily had a card and had baked a heart shaped cake for him.
It was lovely to see. It scored epic levels on the cute-o-meter, and it really cheered her up. Which was great after how poorly she has been. Last year Jack got a bit upset that Lily got a card and he didn’t. At his old school there were lots of girls, and at least 2 that he was good friends with. At his current school his class are all boys, from the few times I have been there I don’t remember seeing to many girls at all. So the opportunity for giving and receiving a Valentine’s card are pretty much non existent.
Jack certainly hasn’t mentioned any that he has got to know. Jack has already completed puberty. It came very early, we think possibly because of medication he has taken. It is no secret that he is very interested in girls. He did go through a stage of wanting to talk to every girl that walked past the house. That seems to have called down a bit now, but when we are out he is always looking at the girls he sees.
Due to his size, he is looking at girls that are a lot older than him, and to be honest I’ve seen them looking at him too. As he is still so young in his ways, and his communication skills aren’t great. When he tries to talk to people when we are out, people have a difficult time understanding him.
He has told us that he wants a wife and kids when he is older. As with everything, we tell him everything is possible. At this stage in his life we don’t want to be telling him he can’t do things, but this is one of those things. That in the back of my mind I wonder if there is any possibility at all.
It’s hard to see right now. And would take some major behavioural changes for it to become even a possibility. If you google, can autistic people…one of the first answers that comes up is, love. There was a time when it seemed the assumption was that they could not. Jack and Lily clearly can, and I think everyone does. They might not be able to have a loving relationship in the the conventional sense. Which some autistic people are unable to do, but they certainly will show love in their own ways.
For now Lily has made Jack a card to cheer him up, and he will also have a card from a secret admirer for him…