Autism and Meltdowns


Autism and meltdowns, the bit I don’t like to talk about much. Things have been going very well recently, when things are going well, you can’t help but wait for things to explode. It’s always there in the back of your mind. When’s it going to happen? There are so many challenges you have to face, being the parent of an autistic child. Then when you have 2 and there problems and needs are completely different. It is so hard to juggle.

The wait for things to explode ends

Today was explosion day for Jack. It wasn’t the worst “meltdown” we’ve ever had to deal with, but it was the worst one for at least 2 months. As I’ve said previously, the change of routine that comes with school holidays is always problematic. The loss of routine causes a spike in anxiety, which leads to a short fuse.

Today Jack has gone to his overnight stay respite. Normally he would go straight from school in his school taxi. Today we have to take him, which again is another change in routine. Sometimes he is still able to go without any major problems. Not today. 

Autism & meltdowns

His anxiety was visible all morning, but it was being kept under control. Just before it was time to go, Lily ran into her art box and hurt her toe. It really hurt her and she cried a lot. Jack immediately lost it. Efforts to calm him down were not effective. Jack as is usual just wanted to fight me, he needs to get his frustration and anger out. He often picks me to take it out on, I guess as I’m the man in the house. He doesn’t want to hurt people, he never does anything to his sister. Who he is very protective of, but the frustration has to come out. The more he keeps it in, the bigger the explosion will be when it comes out.

The important thing with autism and meltdowns, is to try and stay on top of things. Try and keep the anxiety level under control, and try constantly help with Jack’s sensory issues. We try to give him deep pressure and squeezes throughout the today help him regulate.

Today my attempts to calm him weren’t working, so Natalie came to him, whilst I went to Lily. It took a while but he did eventually calm down enough to go. He was reluctant at first, but he made friends with me before he left. The normal respite routine will probably be good for him tonight.

It’s a weird situation. I like it when the kids are home on school holidays. We get more chance to do things together, but if Jack can’t cope with the change. It just makes everything difficult. So you end up feeling like you can’t wait for them to be back at school.

Jack wants time with us

Jack told Natalie that he wants Lily to have a sleepover at grandmas. So he can have a night with just Mummy and Daddy, like Lily has when he’s at respite. We have wondered before if this might happen. So you can expect a phone call grandma haha.

I did manage to finish the Lego Ninjago set (affiliate link) I started yesterday. It took longer than I expected, due to some fiddly parts, but we now have a nice snake. So that should cheer Jack up.

Jack was late getting to respite, so it was getting a bit late by the time Natalie got back. Because of her injured foot Lily didn’t want to go anywhere either, she wanted McDonalds at home and watch a movie. So that’s this evenings plan.

Dad Does Autism

My name is Adam. I live with my partner Natalie, and our 2 children Jack and Lily. Both children are autistic, it is now my mission to show what life around autism is like. Spread the awareness and gain the acceptance that autistic people deserve.

11 thoughts on “Autism and Meltdowns

  • February 19, 2020 at 2:00 pm
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    Hope Lilys toes better and things are calmer today

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    • February 19, 2020 at 2:03 pm
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      All is calm so far 😊 the toe seems fine now.

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  • June 7, 2020 at 11:18 am
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    I love how you try to be proactive to help Jack, I think that is so important.

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    • June 7, 2020 at 5:06 pm
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      Thank you, it’s certainly better to be proactive rather than reactive. We do our best.

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  • June 8, 2020 at 2:07 pm
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    It must be so hard to deal with, you are doing so well.

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    • June 8, 2020 at 4:04 pm
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      Thank you for your comment, we do the best that we can.

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  • June 8, 2020 at 5:18 pm
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    Meltdowns are very difficult for all involved. Taking a pro active approach is absolutely the best thing to do.

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    • June 8, 2020 at 11:33 pm
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      We do our best, and have always believed that to be the case. Thank you for your comment.

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  • June 8, 2020 at 9:05 pm
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    Experience is the best teacher, and it sounds like you have everything in hand! I love that you think about the meltdowns and try to reason out the reasons behind them, hard as that may be. 🙂
    I hope Lily’s toe heals up quickly!

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    • June 8, 2020 at 11:37 pm
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      Thank you, yeah we’ve learnt that finding the reasons, is helpful for all of us.

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  • June 9, 2020 at 10:02 am
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    You do a fantastic job mate. Nothing but respect from me ✊

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